Monday, October 28, 2013

Things I want for my daughter (part 2)....

(If you missed part 1, check it out here.)

So, what about all the "frogs in princes clothing" these girls and teens get their hearts broken over?

I don't want that for my daughter. I don't want her in and out of wasteful relationships and heartbreaks. Someone once made this statement to me and they may have heard it from someone else, 'Dating is good practice for divorce.' true is that! Girls who 'date around' or flit from one guy to the next are not learning the meaning of commitment or even of what a real relationship is and means. Not that I expect them to get it right with the first guy they date (I sure didn't), but if that whole dating scene could be kept to a minimum it would make a huge difference. 

If they would only purposefully choose who to lend their hearts to, and choose someone who respects them and has a strong walk with the Lord... 

Growing up, I was not allowed to date until I was out of high school. At that time, I wasn't fond of that rule, but I was ok and didn't rebel all that much about it. Although lots of other girls around me dated, it wasn't too terribly uncommon to find someone else who wasn't not dating like me, so I didn't feel alone. Now, that concept is almost nonexistent! And these girls are dating starting in elementary school not high school as was common in my time (not that it was all that long ago or anything). But elementary school?!?!

Now that I am an adult, I am SO THANKFUL for my mother's wisdom in helping me to avoid that whole circus. The only wish I have is that she would have talked more to me about her reasons why she did that though AS I was growing up. I never fully understood it until AFTER I was much older and married. My mother never was much of an 'explainer'. I knew she loved me and that she had good reasons for doing what she did because she'd say things like, 'I just don't want you to make the same mistakes and have the same heartbreaks as I did'. I knew she had a terrible childhood and upbringing and she didn't like to talk much about it at all. Or she say things like, 'I grew up without a mother and she was not able to guide me or teach me, so I want to make sure I do that for you'. (Her mom died when she was just 4 or 5 years old). Like I said, I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that she loved and cared for me so I accepted that the rules she had and what she was doing was for my own good even though I didn't always understand it at the time.

I want my daughter to be strong in who she is BEFORE she adds some guy into the mix. I don't want her to be some wacko, crazy, liberal feminist or anything, but simply a healthy, self-respecting girl that possesses a sureness of herself and the person God created her to be. Girls that are unsure of themselves are often taken advantage of or they "lose" themselves getting all wrapped up in the other person only to struggle to "find" themselves again when the relationship ends.

I don't want that for my daughter. 

I want my daughter to love God, first and foremost. I want her to take the best path He has for her. And as she is going along that path, I want her to look across the way and see a guy on the same path, going the same direction, with the same heart for God. That will be the one for her. 

That is what I want for her.

I pray she always remains a "God Girl".

...And while I am at it, that is the kind of person I want for my son's future wife as well....Ahhh, but that is an entirely different post in itself ;)

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